Enjoying the Outdoors

I am typing this from my porch while Tanner & Kevin plant multiple goodies in our garden. We now have a raised garden to go along with our traditional garden. Tonight we've got carrots, tomatoes, okra, cucumbers, jalapenos, and bell peppers going in! We already had a few different varieties of onions. Finally....my dream: A little family & a plentiful garden. ;) (we'll see what actually comes to fruition with the garden!)

It is true...I recall living in Austin for one lonely year. I believe it would've been 2003. I say 'lonely' because though I was in one of the most amazing US cities (in my opinion)...I was not living the life I truly wanted. Granted, I was young, naive, and barely aware of what I really wanted in life. I didn't have many relationships while there, particularly outside of the really unhealthy dating one I was involved in. Yet I would drive through one of my favorite little neighborhoods--Bryker Woods--and imagine the little life I wanted for myself: a charming little cottage home, a wonderful & amazing husband, maybe a little bambino or two, and a plentiful garden. Really, that was what I considered to be "the good life." I was in the beginning stages of playing music, and dating someone that was truly chasing the dream (& quite talented I should add)...but the woman working in her little garden, that was what truly seemed like the ideal life to me. Perhaps it was that dream that led me back to my good ol' hometown (or at least near it) where I had wonderful relationships...and little did I know a wonderful husband that I was waiting to meet.

And now I sit here looking at all the green plants, and watching the baby monitor to see if my precious little bambino is about to stir, and realize that I have it all. This is the good life.

Happy Good Friday, Happy Earth Day....enjoy a wet Easter weekend!

Adrenaline Gone

It caught up with me....I was literally runnin' on about 30 minutes of sleep per night. And adrenaline. And, naturally, the body has to give. For me, the breakdown came in the form of laryngitis. I had to have Tanner make a few phone calls on my behalf---one to my mom to let her know how Lyndon's blood test for jaundice went (he's fine!).

It's not Lyndon at all. Like I mentioned prior, he is SUCH a good baby thus far. It is ME. Prior to pregnancy, I already had insomnia. And when I'm excited about something, or nervous, or happy...sometimes I want to lay in bed and THINK instead of SLEEP. Heck, that is why I even started writing songs so many years ago---sleepless nights! Thus, the hardest thing about a newborn is myself!!

But last night I caved and just took a (or rather 1.5) Tylenol PMs. Worked like a charm! I got two 3-hour pockets of sleep. This is heaven compared to 30 minutes!! I still know I need to take it easier than I have been. My friends are AWESOME & get that and have been texting instead of calling so that I don't use my speaking voice. I want them to hang out so bad, but they know better than I that I'd ramble on and end up losing my voice yet again. My friends really, really get me. (Funny, it's the acquaintances in my life that are more persistent about trying to come over & what-not...and I'd much rather talk to my close friends!)

So, anyway, with newfound energy....and less crying from lack of sleep...I feel like a better momma. Tan & I gave Lyndon his first little bath in the sink. No soap, just a little cloth & water action to ward off the spit up. It was fun!

Now, being the good girl I am trying to be, I will shut this down & go get a nap while baby sleeps! Here's to more & more sleep so I get better & better at this job!

Parents. Newbies, that is.

Wow, I am sleeping so much better since we've been home! The (in)famous first night home as parents really wasn't too sleep-depriving. (Thank you, God!) I had heard horror stories. But, honestly, just getting out of that hospital bed & room after 4 days straight of staring at those walls was very refreshing. Don't get me wrong, I am thankful for the long hospital stay--I am sure my body needed it--but nothin' like home sweet home.

And here I sit for a very quick write up on night 2 of Back Home with Lyndon. Tanner & I make a great tag team thus far. I (try to) stay in bed for most duties since I was told at Mercy that I was trying to be too active too soon post-surgery. I just say Tanner's name & he hears it in the baby monitor, and he promptly comes to the bedroom to get Lyndon for a diaper change. Seriously, Tanner has the changes down to an art form. Then he brings baby back for me to feed. And though we hit a few recent feeding snags, I think they are getting hammered out & breastfeeding (BF) is going quite well.

Lyndon had been the apple of the lactation specialist's eye at Mercy, but that was before the monumental milk arrival. The ball game changed then. :) I know now why they say BF is a commitment. I honestly don't know how women who work full time even attempt to pull it off!

Tanner's mother is ready to help us at any moment's notice, and today she took me on my first postpartum outing. Specialty bra store & Target for nursing tanks. (Again, BF is an all-consuming commitment). Those errands were enough to exhaust me. Not to mention we both could not help but miss Lyndon. We made a quick Sonic drink run & headed home to see how the boys were doing. Ya know, I didn't doubt Tanner being on his own for a second. He's already such a good daddy & if anything, I predict he'll be the logical, discerning parent when it comes to the initial newborn scares that new parents all deal with. I'll be the nut case. Haha.

Ok, that's it for my little journal log. Gonna go back to shut the ol' eyes. I am sure another feeding is just around the corner. And we gotsta be extra diligent because at 8:45 this morn Lyndon will see his pediatrician. I've been a good little momma & have logged all his feeds & poos...now we just hope that the doctor tells us all is going well with baby boy thus far.

One thing is for sure: Lyndon has the sweetest little temperament. I hesitate to gloat too much because I may jinx it, but he just goes with the flow in most situations. Perhaps it may help that Tanner & I are flooding him with kisses every 5 minutes? Who knows! But keep it up, baby boy! Your mother & father appreciate your calm nature more than you could ever know!!

Lyndon. Love.

Wow, has my world changed since the last entry. Here we sit at April 10, 2011. It is 6 am. I am in a hospital room with a sleeping husband to my left. I watch his shoulder heave slowly up & down. 'Happy Anniversary, love,' I send his messy bedhead with my thoughts.

I look directly down and nestled so comfy & cozy between the pillow that props this writing utensil & myself is 6 lbs and 7 ozs of the most perfect living thing I've ever laid eyes on. (he's lost a bit o' weight since birth).

Lyndon James. His little right hand clutches at the elastic top of my pale blue nightgown (the one I bought just for this occasion). He ever-so-slightly squirms. With his belly full of colostrum and the memory of a sweet little burp he did in my face as I settled him into a cozy spot, his tiny shoulders heave up and down. 'Happy Anniversary, love, ' I send his little black-haired head. 'Happy 3rd Anniversary of the best 3 days of my life!'

Yes, I could've blogged last night, the official night of absolutely zero real sleep. No real sleep because even though the sweet nurse took him to the nursery twice, I just laid there & marveled at how amazing all of this has already been. I also marveled at how crazy modern medicine is to think that only a few hours before I had been sliced open, only now to be stitched up & holding the living thing that was once inside me. With the post-surgery drugs and my emotions/hormones running high, perhaps it is best that I DID NOT blog. Yes, in the middle of the night I cried just a little because I was so stinkin' happy. (and tired. and delirious) I could not quite fathom just how or why God bestowed such an amazing gift to me. On loan, of course.

Lyndon James Hubbert, I can not promise I'll get everything right. Not even close. Shoot, I've already done a couple of really crappy post-poo poo diaper swaddles that I am certain the nurses tried not to snicker at. I am certain there will be more whole-hearted, short-falling mommy maneuvers over the next several years.

But I know this much: nothing at all can describe, replace, remove, or overshadow this immense love that God already placed in my heart for you. I only hope to try to show it to you through my actions of affection, discipline, conversation, gifts, surprises, rules...

Tanner, one year ago today I married you. And now the three of us sit here in this hospital room, about to begin a new adventure.

I love both of these guys so much & my heart just may burst.

The End. (cue the happily ever after music)

bump in the night

Here are a few bumps from last night's dinner with Whitney. We took these picks in the middle of Penn Square & unassumingly created a tiny scene. One guy walked by & stuck out his gut and wanted to know if he could join us. Thanks, dude. ;)

Isn't Whitney just the cutest little preggo? She will most likely be meeting baby Jack a few days before I meet my bundle. How fun!

Fragments of Friday

I've not been good about implementing a 'series' of sorts...so here is Volume II of FoF in hopes that I do it a bit more:

-It is a GORGEOUS Friday! The sun hid from us almost all week, so on this April Fool's Day most of us are feeling pretty good. No foolin'!

-I bought a lot of groceries for a 'stock up' recently but I am going out for food a lot...gonna grab Italian with some gals tonight, cookout at Tanner's boss's house tomorrow for lunch, my sis is making steaks for everyone tomorrow night. I'm not complaining, I want to do all these things while I still feel like it! I may not get around to using the onion & lettuce up before they go bad, and I'm fairly OCD about trying to use everything I buy, but it's all good. ;)

-the girls tonight are not my usual "crew"...well, aside from Jenn! ...but Whitney & I are only 3 days apart on our due dates & we've been wanting to hook up pre-babies so she invited me to tag along with her & Jenn's best pals. I do know them & they are super fun and humorous. And how fun to introduce our bumps. Haha.

-I am now reading Uncle Tom's Cabin on my ereader and a silly romance novel in paper. I'm also starting "What to Expect the First Year." Throw in some People magazine, and you can see my ADD reading habits come to life.

-I always SAY I'm gonna take a nap & never do. I tend to lay around and read/think/boob tube nap time. But, man, this week, I can sleep like a BABY when given the chance! No pun intended.

-Said naps must make up for the 3 am, 4 am, 5 am bathroom trips I take every night.

-I always TRY to quit drinking any liquid by 9 pm. It is SO hard! I love me lots of water & juice at night! I usually cut it off officially by 9:15. Life would be easier if my curfew was 8 pm.

-May have some new delivery news on the homefront. May not be delivering the way I had been preparing/planning to. More on that once I see my doc next week & get the official word. I trust him & know he will do what is best for baby and me, so that is all I can say to that.

-That being said, in a world where the due date is actually the official date, and we don't count the rest of today...........I'LL MEET MY SON IN 14 DAYS!!

Lauryn Hill Zion

I'll be glad when my hormones are back in check. I am working on my "labor & delivery iPod mix" today and when I got to this song, tears were pouring.

Well, ok....this song used to make me cry way before even getting pregnant. I'm gonna be a big ball of emotion when I meet my little guy. You may wanna steer clear of me if you don't like sappy! ;)