My Cyber Cents on Tragedy

In our social media world, we all get a chance to share our deepest thoughts with the world.  Just as I am doing now. ;)  Sometimes, I am not so sure we've really sorted them out before we start jumping on Twitter/Instagram/Facebook/blogspot.

And when 20 small children have died at the hands of a gunman....we desperately want to make sense of it.  There is a new stage in grief (the classic seven is now eight).  It is the cyber stage.  We type our anger, our sadness, our shock.  It could very well  now be part of the healing process for humans.

For what it is worth, it's just lil ol' me talking here, may I supply a voice of caution?  I am reading some things that concern me a tad.  The latest example was someone I know (and love!) praising Mike Huckabee.  I don't have cable, I've barely seem the media coverage....but I hopped over to Mike's site to see his quote.  I am gonna assume my  relative/friend was referring to his sentiment that since God is no longer "on the front end" we can't be so quick to pray to him "on the back end."  I get it.  It is an easy argument to jump to as one tries to make some sense of this.  It is also easy to spout off one's view on gun control, whether for/against.  (although, let's face it, it's not a black & white issue at all).

Prayer in school now becomes another political hot button in the wake of tragedy.  People want to finger point badly (which is a totally normal response in grief)...and blaming the government is easy.

But I must tell you this from my personal experience.  PRAYER HAS NEVER LEFT SCHOOL!  I promise.  Here is my firsthand experience in that truth.  I moved back to Oklahoma in 2003.  Shortly thereafter, I took a teaching job with OKC public.  Some of you know the school, and I will keep it nameless here, but it was most definitely not your momma's sweet little suburban school. ;)  I learned so much in those 3 school years!  I also deepened my relationship with Christ in ways that I never could have fathomed, and I will always attribute that to my time at that school.  I tagged five women on this facebook link.  They worked at that school with me.  Anna, Piper, Samantha, Erin, Stephanie.  They are all incredibly prayerful women.  We also had some very prayerful men there.  I can guarantee you that every single DAY multiple prayers were uttered over our students, the school, our mission.  No, we didn't have an "official" prayer over an intercom.  No, we didn't have official teaching lessons about God.  But if ever a student asked one of us about our faith....are you kidding me, of course we told them what we believed!  And many of these kids were looking for something.  Oh, friend, God was in that building all the time.  Great things happened there.  Sad things happened there.*  God was with us, through it all.  And, see, that is just one tale among THOUSANDS to attest to the fact that many prayerful people are in public schools.  Besides, don't you think even thousands MORE who are not teachers pray for our school children?

I am not attempting a school prayer debate here. I just want to illustrate that that argument is a pretty weak one.  Whether or not a governing body mandates prayer, you bet your Bible verses that I was praying at my teaching job!  And so very many others do!

My caution is this:  Let's not take our grieving processes and make them political warfare.  No doubt ALL of us humans--liberal, conservative, Christian, left-wing, etc--- MUST agree that this crime was horrific and unacceptable.  We all agree that LOVE is the only way for us not to extinct ourselves.  Right?

Bless you in your grief, bless your children as you talk with them, and bless us all as we seek comfort from our Lord.  "Get behind me, Satan!" Satan sucks. I hate Satan. Let's hug one another and not quote politicians & celebrities.



*My saddest memory from that school will always be hugging the neck of a crying, grieving momma.  One of my students died in a gang fight.  I learned of it on the news.

Minimalism of Gas, Part 2

Ha, if you are just now tuning in & read that title....I'd love to know what you thought this quick post was gonna be about. ;)

So here's two things I want to note about the gas hiatus for today.  (And it's officially been 8 days, peeps!)

1:  I finally did it.  I take cool to luke-ish warm showers right now, but today I needed a BATH.  A real one. And I didn't want to leave my house to do it.  Actually, I couldn't leave the house, it was L's nap time.  And, see, it was time for a good leg shave, a nice thorough clean.  (After all, going to the OB/GYN today, haha).  So...I began the venture of heating tubs of water in the micro and intermittently pouring them in.  Tan came home for lunch and he poured the last big one in for me while I was already plopped in the tub as to allow me as much time with the heat as possible. ;)   I was so  happy to be in the warmth.  Granted, the water probably filled an inch and a half of the tub.  And it took a while to get that far. LOL.  But I appreciated that tiny bit of water so much!  Heaven, I tell ya.

2:  I meant to share this last week.  Ya know, if ever you only have a microwave to cook with.  So, it may not be the most nutritious way to eat....processed and all....but here is what I did to add some excitement to one of those bland, blobby TV dinner thingys.  (Cuz they all get pretty bland, no matter what they try to tout on the label).  I cut up fresh bell peppers, onions, & tomato and tossed those on top of the burritos.  All local produce, either from me or mi pappa.  (Do I get cool points for that?  haha).  I also sprinkled on some herbs, I think red pepper flakes & parsley.   Then, a dalop of sour cream.  Voila!  TV dinner with a kick....

A different kind of minimalism?

The minimalism BLOGGING may have dropped out of cyber world…but the purging, I am glad to say, continued on into this summer.  Craigslist has been a big tool.  We sold a bed set, a guitar case, and a few other smaller items that I obviously didn’t need because they are already forgotten!  Granted, I’ve acquired things for the newborn…but I am only saying yes to offers of giving if I truly need it!  And being that I am SUCH a pro now, I know exactly what to expect this go round.  (haha…that’s what I think, huh?). 

And here as we begin August, I want to take a turn into something that is a bit of a twist in minimalism.   Sure, the chain of events that I’m about to tell you (in summary) are not the circumstances we prefer….but being that things happen & you can either find the positive or wallow in the negative…I am looking upon it as a new challenge.

Ok, I don’t feel like telling every single detail because it’s exhausting, but here’s the gist of what happened:

It’s Friday afternoon now.  Well, on Monday, I heard a noise that I was becoming all too familiar with:  a clanging on what sounded like the hot water tank area.  Tan & I knew the dogs had found a new cool hideout under the house via our crawlspace, but I knew Tan had rigged up a temporary “gate” to keep them out while we figured out a permanent solution.  (bear in mind these dogs have full access to a often-AC’d garage).  He had also (somewhat) convinced me that the dogs can not do anything to the gas or water pipes…too sturdy.  However, hearing that sound again on Monday morn left my “gut” feeling funny.  What does a girl do?  Call Dad!  And Dad about hit the roof.  He stays out of the Hubbert business, but on this he was pretty vocal about how those dogs can NOT be under there, period.  Danger, danger.  So the protective momma in me went into high gear & I called ONG to request a pressure check.  The info I gave them garnered an “emergency” response…I tell ya, I had a guy knocking at my door within 5 minutes!  

He did find that we are leaking gas at 3ft/hr…the equivalent of what you need to light a pilot light, I know now.  He shut off our gas & told me I must call a plumber to do further inspection, then we’d need a city inspection.  In my head I am feeling relief & thinking a couple hundred dollars to keep my babies safe is no biggie. 

We have an honest, fair plumber…been through a few ice storms with us ;) ….yet he was the bearer of bad news on Tuesday.  He had to be the one to tell us he found a tiny, tiny leak ABOVE the house, right near the hot water tank (not one that was even remotely dangerous) and being that we were now shut off by ONG pending city inspection, we’d be required to fix everything that was out of code.  Apparently, it is very easy to fall out of code, as it changes a lot.  He told me he sure wished I had known to call him FIRST instead of ONG.  Apparently this cycle of turning off the gas then getting a mandatory city inspection is a tangled web that you don’t wanna get it.  I get it, ONG has to be safe, has to avoid liability.  I won’t harbor anger at them.  We just had a new hot water tank put in 3 years ago, but plumber man found $2000 worth of things on said hot water tank that would have to be updated to be ready for the city inspection.  And as for under the house….he would have to reschedule to come and check for any more leaks, which is more $$, not to mention the costs if he does find any more.  So, we are suddenly needing $3000-4000 in the midst of a season in our marriage that is already ‘lean,’ if you will.   We are floating through this season on almost-maxed credit cards, a lifestyle neither of us had even remotely lived before, as we get past this time of me almost done with a Masters yet pausing to have babies. ;)

And that last part is not woe-is-me at all.  Tanner and I have a game plan with an end in sight, so being in a temporary lean time is not anything we worry about.  However, making a phone call to ONG because you wanted your babies to be safe leading to 3 or 4 thousand dollars to come up with was not in the plan!

All that to say….. we are brainstorming before we call back dear plumber.  We are considering selling Tanner’s truck and becoming a one-car family for a while.  (and how he loved his ol’ beat up truck he just got merely to get to work in!).  I’ve got to get an antique dealer over here, which is something we were gonna do eventually anyway.  So, when there is a will, there’s a way.

But…here’s the thing…we’ve been without hot water and our (gas) stove for five days now.  It’s not that difficult!  Electricity would be tough, yes…but gas, not so much.  Tan & I both agree that lukewarm showers aren’t bad at all.  Yes, that is correct, our water does not even GET cold due to our lovely 112-degree days.  In these dog days we don’t crave steamy showers anyway.  Same goes for the stove---definitely not wanting to heat up our lil’ house with the oven.  But, yeah, I am already missing my sautéed fresh produce I was in the habit of serving up via stovetop since we have three gardens giving us fresh food (thank you, God, for Joanna’s bounty, my dad’s bounty, and ours!)

If it were winter time, we’d be up a creek…our heat is gas…..but I have managed to find one sliver of positive in this record-breaking  heat---you don’t need gas for the home!  I almost want to now see how long we can go without.  Oh, and in case you are wondering, I do a sanitary job on the dishes. J  First, you microwave a tub of water & then pour it in the sink.  Voila!  And, sorry granolas, we are totally buying paper plates & cups this week just to minimize the amount of dishes I must do that way.  It’s mostly knives (for cutting the produce!) and baby items.   So, getting this city inspection will eventually happen…but it’s not a threat.  We can take our time.  I may get creative with more cooking ideas with the toaster & microwave as my only tools! 

april chaos

I need to write this down here so that I can "allow myself" to be okay with the fact that I must freeze my weekly projects for the month of April.

We are coming off a whirlwind of a weekend: Lyndon's 1st birthday, Easter, studying (sorta), relatives in town, and top it off today with Tan & I's anniversary. (**more on that later).

As I look at my syllabi for my courses & scratch my head in wonder of how I am ever on this earth find the time to complete papers & projects...I must officially take a hiatus on Minimalism 2012 til that last final is taken. May 2nd, it's on!!! I will jump back into this self-proclaimed duty with a BIG purge! Can't wait!

Did I mention on this blog (that no one reads) that I am pregnant again? Yea, there's that, too. My headaches, nausea, and lethargic days are high. Seriously, did I just get super lucky with my first pregnancy? All I dealt with then was light nausea and a sciatic nerve!

**Ok, so today I commemorate the day Tanner & I took the big leap. April 10, 2010, really was a gorgeous day. And it's the day my "new" life began! I won't talk all butterflies & lilies and say it has been day after day of endless bliss. (ha!) But I will say that Tan and I make a pretty dern good team.

It's not a grand, romantic love song when you talk about true love. Poetry & music are wonderful, but let's talk about daily living. Love is a whole lotta little things strewn together....when you look up, you have a gorgeous tapestry.

Case in point, two nights ago (Easter & our baby's bday) we were wrapping up the busy, busy day. I was feeling just plain awful. My headache was at a peak and the fact that I had gotten about 4 hrs sleep (no exaggeration) the night before was catching up with me.

Tan's brother called around 6 pm with a very out-of-the-ordinary proposal: He had scored some CLUBhouse Thunder tickets, no fee to Tanner...game was starting right then. Tanner didn't even flinch. I heard him quietly say as he stepped out of the room, "Lisa isn't feeling well, I need to stay here with the boy. Sorry, Jason."

How my heart did melt in that instant.

Of course I couldn't let him do that. "Tanner, if you wanna go, by all means GO! I can manage."

He looked at my sincerely, "Are you SURE? I don't think that's a good idea..." To give ya the Cliff's Notes, I talked him into it. And I am so glad I did.

Now, my hubs is a smart man. However, he married a smart woman. ;) I'd spot reverse psychology in a heartbeat, and he meant what he said in that first response to his brother. That's love, folks.

Minimalism #9

Well, it's official: This past week, I dropped the ball on my official commitment to minimizing the "stuff" in my life. I am sitting here racking my brain to see if there is anything that can count.

But I've played that game too much the past few weeks. Realizing after the fact that I did indeed purge something.

No, starting anew, it needs to be an activity that was done with conscience effort.

Oh, alas!! I can justify something!! Before I get too nit-picky with myself, how could I forget when it is staring me in the face!! :)

We have a "front table" as we call it; it sits right by the front door. Junk tends to multiply in the lone drawer. Coupons, mail we "might need" later, marriage license(s), winter gloves, insurance cards, gum wrappers, paper clips, expired coupons, TONS of address labels all those nonprofits send ya, stamps.

The list goes on. About every 3 months, we realize we can no longer smoothly close said drawer. And, yes, important stuff ends up lost among total clutter.

So...when I needed Lyndon's SS card the other day, I knew that drawer could be harboring it. Thus, I began dumping the content & I ended up doing a drawer purge! I did something for my year goal!

I guess most importantly, I de-cluttered the front drawer. The Hubbert home is still quite messy these days (and, yes, I will blame it on my everyday sickness, constant homework, and finding time with Lyndon to be more important...because obviously I am a justifier & blamer on many fronts, heehee) but darn it, we have a newly-organized drawer!

Minimalism #8

Ok, this may be stretching the rules a tad.....the bottom line is that I dropped the ball on my minimalistic visions last week.

However, Sunday rolled around & we technically did some major throwing away. Kenny, Kevin, Tanner, & I did a complete overhaul on the garden! Yeah! It is that time of year!!!

See, I think I can technically add this feat because there is so much more than just leaves & dead plants that we pruned out.

Our yard tends to gather ALL of the debris from the street. We have a brush-type thing that divides us from our eastside neighbors. Thus, we get everything from Sonic cups to cereal boxes intertwined in the bushes. No lie. It gets pretty trashy.

So, it's ALL cleaned out & ready for planting! If I could just get past this amazingly AWFUL allergy bout I am having, I would hop to it. Seriously, shots have cured me & when I get super sick with allergies, there must be some awful, awful stuff going on outside. As I write this, I am next to a bedroom window and I can hear that wind howling.

Gotta go get our taxes done in a bit & I am honestly scared to leave the house. I was so sick last night at my class that I finally had to just leave because the sneezing was nonstop....and due to some stomach issues that were coinciding, I just knew that whole situation could end very badly for me. ;P

Ok, so last week was a stretch (and it was technically Sunday) but I'm countin' it and moving on.

Hmmm, what will THIS week's project be? Thinkin' a possible Half Price Books trip...

Minimalism #7

Again, Saturday night came 'round and I had not gotten rid of anything...except the mounting pile of schoolwork that was stressing me!

So, as I sat on the bed of our newly-restored (ie, cleaned out) guest room--which is where I am doing homework these days because now I can actually get to our printer-- I noticed a very cluttered bookshelf. I knew it was mostly my junk and not only could I get it clean...I could throw out more clutter & meet my weekly goal!

Man, the weekly goal thing is GREAT for me. A little project like that would get overlooked & forgotten so fast. But I had this nagging sense of urgency to do SOMEthing to minimize for the week.

Thus, I cleaned & decluttered an entire bookshelf, found a book I may wanna read, found a book a friend had loaned over a year ago (and I promptly called to say I had it & would be returning it soon...he wasn't even worried).

Try it. Set a weekly goal. Then even the smallest of projects feel rewarding.

Minimalism #6

So, Saturday night rolled around & I realized I hadn't truly done anything to work towards minimalism this week. Oh no!

Alas, I was saved....by my Prince Tanner.

I took Lyndon to a wedding shower with me earlier that day & stayed gone most of the afternoon, while dear husband cleaned our guest room out TOP TO BOTTOM. Literally. It was no longer a guest room, but a storage room.

And to make it easy, I told him anything of mine in there that was dirty, broken, or just stupid...he could toss! Turns out he tossed a ton of stuff.

The only thing that slightly saddened me was my above-the-knee Chinese Laundry grey suede boots. But it was my poor care that led to their toss out....they were pretty stained. However, had I taken care of those sweet babys they would be part of my winter minimalism collection for sure. Thankfully, my black ones are still in tip-top shape and make regular appearances in my wardrobe.

So, by Saturday night we were ready for our out-of-town guests. (we had fun with Abe, Steph, and sweet baby Jet). AND I had met my weekly goal!

Minimalism #5

Did my 'good riddance' for this week...took more clothes in. It may seem like I'd have nothing left in my closet with so many clothing purges.

But, I am a woman. A woman who has been pregnant. I probably don't need to go any further to explain why this means I have various 'groupings' of clothes to be free of.

I also sold one baby item the other day.

I think a very, very big item is up next. It will involve getting an antique dealer over to our house. Any suggestions?

Minimalism #3 & #4... and more.

So, yes, I did do my minimalist activity last week....just didn't take the time (or rather, I did not HAVE time) to record it here. I sent away some baby clothes to a mommy friend. I also got rid of a few more of my own clothes. And speed up to this week....I, once again, sold an obsolete item on Craigslist. So I've kept my Minimalist Vow for an entire month so far. Woohoo!

And on to a story for the day. One of those ones I just don't want to forget, so it must go here on my virtual diary. I won't preface with too many details other than to say I've been very, very down for a few days now. Lots of tough stuff going on in the Hubbert home. Glad we've got each other, we love each other...but, man, times are tough. And I've really fallen into a “woe is me” state in the last 48 hours or so. So many circumstances in my life currently feel too difficult to handle.

And today, in a mad dash to get Lyndon some baby toothpaste at Mega-World Wal-Mart, I was completly, utterly humbled. I was checking out when a woman in an electronic wheel chair began to make her way over to our line. She wanted to stop and coo at the baby in the cart in front of me. She was the greeter at this particular WM door, and this was just a little 'break' in her work. I quickly recognized her as a girl I graduated from high school with. It is amazing how quickly this sprung a well of emotion in me. First, I was shocked. S was quiet in high school and we only had the occasional class together, yet it really hit me hard to see her under such different circumstances. Secondly, as she cooed at that baby, the shame I felt for how much I've been pitying myself was enormous. My eyes fill with tears just even recounting and revisiting that moment.

I'll interject here...I am not sure if you can call this a 'sign from God' moment. At least not in the sense we sometimes speak of divine signs. Sometimes I think we Christians are a bit ego-centric to think that so many things that happen in the world around us were meticulously placed for our benefit. I will say that I believe God gives us hearts, minds, and eyes to seek these sort of moments. They happen often, but we don't always see them.

I reintroduced myself to S. I am not certain she truly recalled me from high school. She smiled & after a tad bit of small talk, she openly told me about her nerve disease. I wish I could recall the long, long name of it...but, alas, I can not. Definitely was not MS or Huntington's. She said she saw early signs of the disease at 17, and during college she began to lose the ability to walk.

“So, I am paralyzed from the waist down,” she smiled up at me with true peace. Then she shrugged, “Whaddya do?” She giggled.

I took her hand and trying my darndest to not get too teary: “I just have to tell you that I was having a very bad day. And you just encouraged me so much. Your strength is so wonderful.” (something to that effect...seriously, I was so emotional that the moment is blurry, literally).

I told her I hoped to see her again, and walked my shameful, emotional self through the rain and into the car. This moment was epic in the journey I am currently on.

Thank you, S. I just hope the random, emotional, blubbering girl you graduated from Memorial with didn't scare you too much. ;)

Minimalism #2

Ok, good thing I met my weekly goal on Sunday. After attending a (fabulous) party for a (sweet!) 2-yr-old named Micah, I promptly went & sold/donated a ton of clothes. So there's that.

And here it is Monday night & I am feeling the pressure up to my neck with all the things I got going on. Mind you, I know I create these conundrums, but everything is with purpose. Either to pay the bills, finish my schooling, or just cherishing a friend...I only say YES when it is a priority.

But today, after testing a client & picking up my boy (who had puked at school), and then coming home to messes...I felt stressed. Testing a client involves much more than just the actual administration of tests. (That is actually the easier part). My sweet husband is building me a website & needs my input on the content. My friend & I have a wedding booked and we need to get things worked out with the bride. Gotta follow up on some other music-related things. Gonna record a childrens' album this spring. Followed up with a 'library tour' for a show we have yet to write. Ahhh, sweet stress!

Went to the gym to just stretch, think, absorb. Then back home to hit the grindstone. And take 10 minutes to write the blog that I MUST use for accountability if this minimalism thing is gonna stick.

But then I peeked at sweet little boy. He's not sick, BTW. Just a combination of prunes from yesterday & some tummy-jostling led them to think so at first. :)

When he is sleeping curled up with his lovey & looking so peaceful, the love that overflows from my heart reminds me that I do it all for him. For our family. And if I ever become the so-called "super-mom" that tries to do it all, so help me.

Taking time to play with him, four on the floor, no phone in sight, is the BEST. I must make that the priority over all.

Minimalism #1

So, here is my attempt at accountability for my year-long project. Even if it is only to view myself, I will complete one weekly task--however small--to free myself of 'stuff.'

Granted, I am starting to see firsthand how wonderful it is for little boy's development and curiosity to have many toys strewn about. While right now actually purchasing many toys is out of the question for us, my dear friend Nova just passed along many toys her 2-yr-old boy outgrew...so, yes, I've acquired new things. We only kept what he truly is interested in. I can handle that!

BUT my first 'good-riddance' this week was selling 2 baby items that have become obsolete for us.

Prior to 2012 beginning, I expunged several clothing items.

Next week: perhaps another purge of clothes. We shall see!

Music is Good for the Soul

It comes in waves. I'll sit down and commit to charting/learning a song I've always meant to. This is rare. So I went with the energy when I decided I was going to learn, "Making Pies" by Patty Griffin. I truly think it may be the most heartwrenching, beautiful folk song I know. You may need to check it out RIGHT now:



If this is your first Patty Griffin experience, I now welcome your ears to the most prolific, gifted living songwriter (IMHO). I know I am not alone in that sentiment.

I'm gonna perform "Making Pies" at my gig tonight....Picasso's at 8pm....Yea, I am NOT a Picasso fan but I'm giving it another go (read my old blog about their past musical sins) mainly because my bud Casey is doing Acoustic Oklahoma there.

And here's some more Patty because this one always gets me, too:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p6hpwl9rTL0

I was thinking about the lyrics while in the shower. Yes, that is a mother's best thinking place. ;)

Forty years go by with someone laying in your bed
Forty years of things you say you wish you'd never said
How hard would it have been to say some kinder words instead
I wonder as I stare up at the sky turning red.

I love these lines & will take it as a good reminder to be good to my spouse as we venture into 2012 together. One year at a time. ;)