A Passionate Principle

I am reading a book right now that is very well-written. I stumbled upon it, really. I was trying to find a few books that had popped up multiple times on critics' best of 2010 lists...not always best sellers, mind you...and my local library was out of this one. However, the author had a few other novels so I picked this one:

"Whatever Makes You Happy"

It explores some very interesting concepts of happiness and a modern-day tale of a wife/mother/author trying to research the topic. However, I hit the place in the book where she begins an affair with another married person. I got mad at the book last night and put it down. But I also am curious how it's gonna play out. Will there be consequences? Will she get caught? I know it is mere fiction, but her husband has been painted as a truly loving, caring man and I am so angry at the leading lady that I don't know if I want to keep reading to answer these questions. Now, I know good, really good, books and movies are supposed to make you think, make you FEEL, and that doesn't always mean you are gonna like what the 'protagonist' is doing. Ya gotta stick around to get to the lesson. If there is one.

But this book is reminding me of why I used to cringe when I'd hear ladies gush about how romantic "Bridges of Madison County" was. That movie disgusted me. I was young, but old enough to know that she totally betrayed her spouse & she sucked because of that.

Twice in my life I've had someone I care about dearly confide their infidelity to me. Mind you, I wasn't finding out before the spouse...they were telling me in the aftermath, and it was very privileged information. Had it been the former situation--well, that is a whole 'nother ball game that I pray I am never a part. I'd have to do what I think was right, probably losing a friend in the process. However, they were just sharing with me some deep-rooted feelings & transgressions. There wasn't as much guilt vocalized as I thought there'd be, but lots of sadness. It brought me into inner conflict very quickly...I love the people I let into my life for specific reasons and want to be good to them. My biggest beef with humans is judgement, so I want to very specifically not judge those around me. (I'm not God, after all). However, there is nothing I despise more than infidelity. I believe it is the cruelest deception one can bestow upon another, I don't care what the background story is. (People like to justify this action, I've noticed). I've known it to destroy lives, marriages, kids' confidences, faith, and much more. It is truly from the devil's playground & every person in a committed relationship must guard themselves from it fiercely.

So, as I was saying, inner conflict has never reached quite the pinnacle as when I learned someone I loved did something I despised. I chose to be firm in vocalizing what I thought, but also supporting them with my ear as they picked up the pieces of a very broken situation. I know at the end of the day...you can't make someone become as passionate about your personal principles as you are. This is still a tough one to me, though. I don't have a quick one-liner to summarize how one should react.

And as for my book...it's resting on my bed, spine up, while I decide if I feel like "hearing her out." I probably will. But she's not my friend & she's not even real, so I don't have to wrestle with loving her in the process. She can stuff it. :)